Comparisons, comparisons

JM and I were watching our home movie of the day our kids were born recently, and I'm always struck by the words the nurse said while attending to N in the nursery, weighing, measuring, and cleaning N. The nurse, after noting that she was born a twin at just three pounds and seeing what size both N and E were, said:

He's bigger! Yep, he's bigger. But, never compare them. Never compare.

I laugh about the contrast: first, she compares them, then, she exhorts me to never do just that.

Of course, there is no resisting comparing them, and at this stage and age, so long as it is without judgment, it seems harmless enough. It is fascinating because it reinforces for us how they are different -- their environment and how we treat them is virtually the same, so any differences we observe are specific to who they are, and largely driven by biology!

• N has sensitive skin, while E does not
  
• N outweighed E until he started to be much more physically active, and then E caught up and outweighed N, until their most recent checkup: N is now heavier than E again
• E was the first to "talk"
• N was the first to crawl, and E would crawl three months later
• E, most times, seems to be the "easy baby"
• E sleeps more
• N stands in his crib and jumps up and down when I enter the nursery in the morning, while E is usually slower to become active
• N seems more emotionally sensitive at this point

I suppose that parents of two children are always tempted to make comparisons, but unless those children are twins, the comparison is usually based upon memory, and so not as obvious and right in front of you, all the time. It provides a little lab of observation, and it is a lot of fun.